Sunday, April 27, 2014

How Mommies Can be Part of the Solution

Mommy Blogging Resolutions

This is a wonderful,  thoughtful article on how we need to re-evaluate our discussions, evaluations, and conversations concerning the *mommy wars*.

I've listened in on conversations between newer generation mommies (most notably the mommies of my grand babies and friends of my oldest daughter) and, as I hear their struggles and desires, I realize there is no place for the mommy wars.

No room for more friction, more guilt, more judgment, more strife.

The job (which really isn't a *job* at all) is too time consuming, too stressful, too large for us to *mother* alone.

We need the grandmas who walked before us. We need the aunties who are jolly and refreshed. We need the husbands who support us. We need the men in our lives to tag-team. We need the uncles who do the hunting and fishing or gaming or swimming or monster trucking or sports watching when the daddy cannot or does not.

We need each other.

America has sold us the brazen idea that we do things independently and apart from family. But that is a false ideal.

Family is meant to be familiar with one another and with the needs of each.

We don't judge. We don't fall into false gossip. We simply do. We comfort. We listen. We offer a helping hand.

There is no room for mommy *wars*.

There is plenty of room for mommies helping mommies. That's the true calling of mommies: to be there for one another.

My friend Crystal shared the ideal her mother raised her with, "Don't be part of the problem if you can't be part of the solution."

It's become part of my mantra as a grandmother whether I'm assisting the daughter working outside the home or the daughter who has chosen to stay at home this season. I realize each one has something that the other one would like and they are both making life-giving sacrifices and I need to sympathetic to those sacrifices and not compare or judge but entrust their sacrifices to God and trust, not in my own strength or in their's but, in the will of God for them.

I've realized we truly orbit around seasons and the seasons of our lives evolve us into the mothers we become.

Are we, as mommies, assisting one another in the *war* to raise good, hard-working, compassionate children or are we fighting against each other?

How can we open the flap of our camp to that mother in the other camp? How can we help relieve the stress and pressure she finds herself under? 

How can we serve?

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